That's Not a Trail

Drake and I have an ongoing disagreement.

He thinks that any gap in the underbrush should be considered a trail, and that we can walk that trail.

I think that for something to be considered a trail, I should be able to a) stand up and b) not bleed while walking on it. Thus far, we are still arguing over who is right.

It's not that I'm not willing to crawl to take him on a "walk." I've done it before. Actually, I did it this morning. It wasn't that long a crawl, after all, and how else could we get through the space in the bush that Drake had leapt through? He was already on the other side, hot on the scent (literally: he was panting after some deer trail), and trying to coax him back didn't seem the best idea. Since the bush got really thick about three and a half feet above ground, I crawled. No problem.

It's also not like the trail has to exist at all points along the way. At one point in Whatcom Falls Park, there's a trail that has eroded away, so that it's just a flat vertical surface on the cliff face at some points. It wasn't the wisest thing to do, but I have slung Drake over my shoulder and streeeeeched from foothold to foothold. We didn't die.

Likewise, I'm willing to bleed if I have to. I actually don't begrudge Drake the time he jumped as I was trying to go uphill, and I landed on the edge of a cut stump and sliced my shin open. That was mostly my fault; I hadn't slowed him down.

But crawling and bleeding: that's where I draw the line. And you know, it's particularly hard to get stinging nettles out of your flesh when you're crawling on them. Or maybe that's just me.
So, the disagreement: that's not a trail. He's willing to meet me part way. He'll take another trail if it is a better trail. He'll take another trail if he can't get through (and a trail that's so thickly overgrown that an energetic young pit bull can't get through is, no questions asked, not a trail). He'll take another trail if he'd have to walk in especially cold water. But then there's that fuzzy gray area where we're still negotiating.

Say it with me: That's not a trail.